So I figured I better write something since I have been neglecting you minions.  Sorry about that.  I was off with The Hamster of Doom making plans for world domination.  These things take time.  Really I spent my summer in MI and it felt really nice to get away from the internet so much that I prolonged coming back to it.  Not having to keep up with Facebook and Twitter and blogs and emails and comment responses was actually really nice, but it's time to come back.

So, if you didn't know, I have a yearly tradition.  Every October I watch at least one "horror" movie every day. The reason I use the quotation marks is because these movies are not all scary.  Some are comedies (Zombieland, Rocky Horror Picture Show), some are 60's-70's B-movies (any of the Hammer films), while some are psychological thrillers (American Psycho, Silence of the Lambs), some are cult classics (Evil Dead, The Exorcist), and some are just old-time goodies (Universal monster movies).

I decided that, to kick off my return, to share this past weeks viewings with you and give you my opinions on each of these.  I will also try to include and site links to these movies so you can look up more info on your own.  You can do this by clicking on the movie title.  Some movies may not have links, but I will do what I can to include them for the ones that do.  Also, most of these movies come from Netflix, but some come from my personal stash since one of the best gifts everyone gets me are those bargain box sets that contain like 50 movies on 4 disks and costs only $4.  I will, however, for you, Minions, try to keep the movies to easily available movies or stuff I see on T.V.  I make no promises though. (You could probably find all this stuff on Amazon also.

If you're looking for something to watch, something here might be up your alley.  On the other hand, if you were gonna watch one of these it might just save you the trouble.  So lets get started shall we?

WARNING:  This is a LONG post.  Feel free to skim, you won't hurt my feelings.

October 1: I started out the month with The Ghoul.  I am a Boris Karloff nut!  I love him.  He is my favorite actor and I have to start every October with one of his films.  For those of you who don't know who I am talking about, he's the guy who played Frankenstein's Monster in the old black and white Frankenstein.  This movie is another of those old black and whites that, by today's standards, isn't scary, but back when it was made would scare the crap out of the audience.  Karloff is a dying Egyptologist who has this jewel that is supposed to allow one of the Egyptian gods to come and cart him off to the afterlife.  (I honestly don't remember which god.  I think it was Anubis though.)  Anyway, when someone steals the jewel before the god can come to him, he reawakens in this life somewhat zombie-esque and horror ensues.  Pretty much if you're a fan of the old movie The Mummy (another Karloff classic, NOT the 1999 remake), this movie would be for you.

October 2:  Mad Monster Party?  (The question mark is part of the title not me forgetting the name of the movie.)  This is a good one for the kids or any fan of the stop action animated movies (like Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer).  This is another Boris Karloff, but in voice only.  The catch?  I never knew this existed.  I never even HEARD of it until it showed up on my recommended list on Netflix.  How I missed this little treasure is beyond me, but seeing how I've never seen it on T.V. I'm guessing it didn't do so well.  Anyway, this is a Halloween special about a Dr. Frankenstein inviting  all our favorite monsters to a party so he can elect his successor.  Among the attendees are Dracula, the Wolf-Man, the Invisible Man, Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde and a couple others.  The movie is basically all the monster vying for the position of his successor.  It's a cute little thing that is basically safe for all ages.  
October 3:  Tucker & Dale vs. Evil.  Holy fucking shit!  Where do I start with this one.  I guess I will start by saying I really did not have high hopes for this movie.  On a 5-star rating on Netflix, it averaged a whole 1-star.  Just the name alone screams low-budget B-movie, but since I am a glutton for those crap-fest slasher flix, I popped it on and sat back.  I had no intention of giving it my full attention, but the movie commanded it. While I won't say it is a great movie it was WAY better than I thought it was going to be.  Pretty much the only reason I even gave it a try is because Alan Tudyk (of Firefly fame) stars in it.  I figured he was hard up for money and just took a project to make due.  What starts out as your typical "group of collage age kids go camping in the woods where there was once a series of murders" type movie quickly turns and you don't really see it coming.  Let me state something now.  This is a comedy, not a slasher flick.  That fact just makes the movie that much better.  While it's not chalk full of gut-wrenching belly laughs (though there are a few) it is a silly little movie that will lift your spirits if you are having a bad day.  I commend the writers and actors on their ability to keep this movie light and silly without turning it into one of those "so stupid it's funny" movies and bringing a new twist to the slasher movie genre.   Personally, I gave it a 4-star rating on Netflix, but I can see how this could be one of those "love it or hate it" movies.
October 4: The Comedy of Terrors.  This is a Vincent Price diddy and it is exactly what it claims to be.  A comedy.  It was actually nice to see Mr. Price in a role that wasn't as dark as we are all accustom to, while still staying within the horror genre.  Mr. Price and his sidekick are undertakers who haven't been getting any business.  As the bills pile up, Price decides to create their own clients by killing ppl and stepping in to take the business of burying the dead.  The first one goes well, until they don't get paid for their services, which, is why they did it in the first place.  So, if at first you don't succeed, try, try again, right?  Well upon going for their second victim/client the man just Will.  Not.  Die.  The movie mostly consists of the hyjinxs that ensue in keeping this victim dead.  The movie is a bit dated, but cute non-the less.  I would not, however, recommend letting young children watch simply for the fact of how the characters talk to and berate each other.  Older kids shouldn't be a problem.  I have a 12-year old and I would let her watch this, but I wouldn't if I had a 6-year old.
October 5:  The Omen.  What do I say about this?  It's The Omen for crying out loud.  That original film that made you never want to have kids.  The place where the term "demon spawn" came from.  If you don't know The Omen, have never experienced Damien and don't know the fear of raising the Antichrist, get off my site. But not before clicking the link and educating yourself.
October 6:  This day I actually have 2 movies.  First up is Remains.  I will tell you what I know of this movie.  It starts off looking good.  What I thought was just another B-movie, seemed to have a decent budget and had a good quality cinimatography.  I quickly learned it was because they sunk all their budget on the cameras and neglected the writing, acting and everything else that makes a good movie.  A bunch of ppl, who just so happen to be in rooms with no windows, survive the zombie apocalypse.  Mind you, this apocalypse comes in the form of a big ball of flame that looks similar to the nuclear blast the fried Sarah Connor, but somehow all the buildings are still standing and the only thing that happens is it turns everyone exposed into zombies.  It doesn't sear their flesh off, that stays to rot away later.  Anyway it's up to the survivor who where getting busy in a storage room, and some guy who got locked in a broom closet, to go out and find other survivors.  I can't tell you any more than that.  I stopped paying attention cause my brain started to melt.  This was after only 10 minutes.  I left it on to run in the background while I did more interesting things, like counting how many hairs are on my toes, and this thing just kept going.  It was like it was never going to end.  I can't tell you who made it, what happened or anything, but every time I gave it even 1/8 of my attention I felt my brain trying to come out my ear and had an over-powering urge to shoot myself in the face so I would quit looking.

Second up was Blessed.  I had to do something to wipe my brain clean and since this film stars Heather Graham I was hoping it would do the trick.  Ms. Graham, and the dude who played Mark Antony in Rome, are having trouble conceiving a child and go to docs for help.  They get preggers and all kids of creepy stuff happens.  We've seen these types of movies before.  It wasn't a BAD movie, per se, but it wasn't anything to write home about.  It was right on par with all the other pregnancy horror movies out there.  It did help me get over Remains though.

October 7:  Albert Fish: In Sin He Found Salvation.  This was a docu-drama.  In case you don't know what that is, it's a documentary where they intersplice real footage with dramatizations.  This is the normal format for The History Channel.  If you know anything about me, you should know, I LOVE my serial killers.  I don't know why, I'm just twisted like that.  I can't get enough.  Around this time of year is great for me because they play all the creepy fact-filled stuff on The History Channel that I just eat up.  Although this came to me via Netflix it was along the same lines and I really kind liked it.  Was it awsomely great? No.  But it was no better or worse that the stuff they put on cable T.V.  The difference being that there is swearing.  So right there, it's not for kids.  I honestly wouldn't even let Lil Miss watch this now.  The reason?  If you know anything about Albert Fish it's that his atrocities were carried out on children.  He killed them and ate them.  he was the original Hannibal the Cannibal.  This Italian-made movie is a good delve into the oddity of this particular mad.  Although I was disappointed that the focus was on only his first victim, it also goes into about a bunch of the strange shit he did to himself.  If you are interested in serial killers I would recommend this, but don't expect a full accounting of his crimes since the focus is of the man, himself, and what it was that led to him finally taking that step into murder.

So, there you go, Minions.  Sorry this was such a long post.  If you are still with me, good for you (and thank you).  Seeing how this did take a lot of space I decided that this is what I am going to do:  Since I often watch multiple movies each day, I will post my reviews, as they come, on my Facebook page so you don't have to read all this stuff.  I will work through the week to write a review on one movie each day, but I will try to keep it a bit shorter.  I think maybe taking so much time off might have been a bad idea if when I come back I end up pumping out book-long posts.  Anyway, thanks for reading and hope to see you next week and on Facebook through the week.  And yes, I'm sure the posting will start today (since I'm watching a movie now as well as taping 3).

Leave a Reply.