Me:  Don't try anything with me while I'm sleeping.

DJ:  I already know that.

Me:  Oh, and don't let Satan rape me.

DJ:  Ok.

Me:  Don't let Satan rape me AND don't let him impregnate me with demon spawn.

DJ:  I'll make sure.

Me:  I have enough belly pain without the spawn of Satan's horns poking me from the inside.

DJ:  Yeah, I bet that would hurt.  

Me:  Although...I bet he would eat the goblin.  (For those of you who don't know, I'm convinced a goblin lives in my belly and is trying to tear my guts out with a hook.  At least, that's what it feels like.)

DJ:  He probably would, but I doubt it would be worth it.

Me:  Yeah, even if the demon spawn ate the goblin, he would probably get my intestines wrapped around his horns AND poke me with them.

DJ:  Probably.

Me:  Ok, so, yeah.  No demon spawn.  Although...He probably doesn't even have horns at that stage. They are probably still just nubs so they wouldn't really poke and there would be nothing there to get wrapped around my intestines.  AND the goblin would get eaten.

DJ:  Still probably not worth it.

Me:  Oh and if angry witches are coming to get me, don't just hand me over to them.

DJ:  Ok.

Me:  Well, if witches are coming to get me it's probably just Lizzy and Val, but if they are angry, don't give me up.

DJ:  Ok.

Me:  So, bottom line, don't hand me over to get raped by Satan and get impregnated with demon spawn so angry witches want to come after me.

DJ:  Right.  Got it.

Yep, this is what happens when I watch Rosemary's Baby with DJ.

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